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"Ritual is the technique for giving life"

                                                                           Thomas H. Peters and Robert H. Waterman Jr
                                                                           IN SEARCH OF EXCELLENCE

Homemaking and creating nurturing spaces is something that seems a little old fashioned today. It may be quietly talked about in the safety of women's friendships...but not often. No matter how much we seem to progress in areas of our work, the art of creating the atmosphere of "home" is mostly left to women...and this creation is likely left to chance. Instead we focus on the decoration of our homes, nervously wondering whether or not we got it right.

Some women seem to be born unto this, others, not so much. Creating a refuge for ourselves and our families can be like everything else in life...a journey inside ourselves. Even if we choose not to put ourselves into it..it is still a reflection of our inward journey...something else is more important to us at this time.

As a young girl and throughout my life I have noticed the difference in houses of the women who invited me in. Admiring the differences and learning from each one. It is ritual that sets them apart.
A cooks kitchen, a room for reading, a massive television or a garden, these things and many more broadcast what is valued most by the family who lives there.

Being organized has never come easy to me...I remember the first time I invited my in laws (a very large family) to my tiny ranch style house for Christmas Eve. It was a tradition started in my family by my Aunt Jean. She was an excellent housekeeper and she planned and prepared for weeks before the party. I on the other hand knew what I wanted to serve and had decorated my tree but even the day before, I was ill prepared for guests.

My sister in law Francis stopped by to help and in her wonderfully southern way taught me the "art of stuffing". (That is placing things out of sight under beds and tables and anywhere else we could find the space.) She knew we didn't have time to put things away and clean as we went along so she graciously helped me "stuff". After that I got more serious about my home keeping habits.

It was a practice. I cleaned and the house stayed neat. I let it go. I tried again. I failed again. Until years later neatness is finally a habit. It makes me so happy when my children say I am a clean freak! I am far from a perfectionist. But I do use the technique of ritual...drop it, pick it up, open it, close it, get it out, put it back. These ideas and others were novel to me. They honestly have no idea. What they do know is I want my house to welcome me home...to feel like a hug when I walk in. To be a refuge from the outside world. For regrouping, refreshing and renewing my Soul before I go back out into the world and I want it for my family also.

Now for the the ritual of dusting.....