Reasons To Celebrate

"Grown-ups never understood anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them."

                                                                             Antoine De Saint-Exupery


Early Monday morning my husband and I flew to an idyllic setting in the rolling hills of Tennessee. The reason for the trip was a celebration of life for his cousin Craig. Craig died recently with a horrible and painful cancer yet he was surrounded with many people who loved him and he knew that they were there.

His mother, my husband's aunt Helen, is one of the people I admire most in this world. Many years ago when her children were young, she was driving to meet her husband after work and came upon an accident. The accident involved her husband who died at the scene leaving Helen with three small children to raise. Craig was eight years old and he was the eldest. Now he has died leaving behind his eight year old daughter. Before he left his body he said wanted Amanda to have what he did not have growing up: her father.

It is strange how sometimes life loops around...how both Amanda and Craig lost their father at eight years old. Why remains yet another of life's  mysteries. I wonder if we ever discover the why's? God reveals some secrets but others remain outside our level of understanding. It is here that we can only rest in the love God has for each one of us. Losing the questions in our complete and total faith that the Master of the universe...God, the everlasting father, the prince of peace is in control and all is well.

Everyone who came together for Craig's celebration of life stayed at the same lovely lodge which had gathering places indoors and out with garden paths and woodland trails. Being together for 24 hours allowed time for Craig to reveal himself through stories told by those who loved him best. We watched video pictures and listened to stories as we sat by the outdoor fire and made smores.

There was a pond with fish to feed for the children. I watched Amanda play with her friend. She seemed to sink into the comfort of her surroundings, knowing that everyone who gathered here cared about her loss. She will surely miss the father whose legs she rubbed to bring him comfort. But now she will go on...with her beautiful  mother, full of strength and love and her wise and courageous grandmother to guide her.


This is what Craig wanted, those he loved to gather and celebrate his life. It was a restorative day a time for reconnecting with distant family members and resting in the fact this is part of the unfolding of life. His wife and mother and sister honored his wishes in such a precious way and will continue to celebrate him as they go about the days of their lives. His body may be gone but he is still with them in their memories...being helpful...as Amanda said.